August 1, 2011

lit d'hôpital deux

The last 3 days have definitely not been my best, or my families.. the stress levels have taken their course, and have made us feel more tired then we were with our daily lives.. However, 3 days ago I made a decision! I decided that, during these 10 days that I am stuck in these 4 walls, I will be as positive as I can be, smile as much as I can, make people laugh, and embrace those that are around me. 


I feel so lucky. This might sound weird, coming from where I am right now, in a hospital bed, watching my tired mom sleep - because she wakes up before I do, gets ready for the busy day, and never leaves my side, to help me with everything.. - anyways.. I feel lucky because I have a family that is supportive of me and thinks of me, loves me, cherishes me, understands me.. that does not bore me with hospital jungle stuff and lets me be who I am.. my parents, my immediate family, aunt, cousin, grandma, and others.. everyone that has held my hand and has helped me and my parents! I am thankful for your prayers and your help.. 


I am so lucky to have "my baby"!!! I can not thank him enough! words are limited, my feelings aren't.. he has been with me and my family since the start. Has not left my side for a second - we push him away from the room so that he would go home and sleep.. but he comes back the first thing in the morning.. I am so lucky to have him on my side, holding my hand when I need him, and him making me laugh no matter what.. he is my strength! I am even more thankful to his parents, who have let him stay with me all day, everyday.. who have supported me and my parents in ways that I am not sure how to explain.. but I know one thing, today when I saw "my baby"s parents, I got this mixed feelings of joy, hope, and a little bit of cluster.. not sure what that cluster was, but I think it was their inner thought and feelings about seeing me in a hospital bed - which does not sadden me but makes me happy knowing they care about me.. 


I cannot thank my friends enough, they have not left me alone, those who call and those who visit.. I realized how much people I have in my life that are important to me.. seeing their faces, when I least expect it, them looking over me and trying to sympathize with me actually makes me feel I am really, incredibly lucky.. thank you to each and every single one of you!


3 days are almost over, now we are moving on to the next 7 - is that countdown correct, I am not sure? 
but days go on and soon we will be out of here.. And I will remember these 10 days as a time off , with the gratitude deep in my bones for those around me!

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