October 27, 2011

holding onto myself


I try to hold on to myself, my inner child, my own beliefs and my inner music..

I try to hold on to myself, protecting that inner child from all the bad that comes from outside, all the growing up needed to survive in this world, and all the growing up that kills the happiness with in me.

I try to hold on to myself, my own beliefs.. that gut feeling of right and wrong, the “love-li-hood” that lives within, the arrow that guides me, in this cruel world.

I try to hold on to myself, to my inner music.. the tune that keeps my feet twitching in meetings, the rhythm my body moves in, the rhythm of my steps while I walk.. the music that gets me out of bed even during the grey days..

I try to hold on to myself, never let go.. holding it down from a cliff and trying to never let it slip from my hands.. but the grease that this life has put onto my body, the wind that’s trying to blow us over, and the light that shuts my eyes and keeps them from seeing makes it harder each day..

But I am holding onto myself, trying to never let go and trying to survive..

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